Coffee Talk Friday: Education

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By Rebecca Teti

Fridays: Education

(Join each day’s Coffee Talk discussion: Mon: Parenting; Tues: Open Forum; Wed: NFP; Thu: Marriage; Fri: Education; Sat/Sun: Changing Roles)

Whether your children attend school or are homeschooled, this is the spot to ask questions about curricula, religious education, parent-teacher relationships, or academic concerns of any kind.

Please join us!

Rebecca Teti


  • I hope this might fit with today's topic: My children {2 girls and 1 boy}attend the youth group for teens at our parish each week. I am very pleased with the program, the leaders and the volunteers, but have a big concern. Whenever the girl group of teens get a break to socialize, it almost always focuses on boy/girl relationship troubles and heartbreak-how much sleep and tears are lost over ex-boyfriends, pressure into physical closeness outside of marriage and the idea that they are "nothing without a man". Ugh. I need to talk to the director {who runs the boy's group at the same time} and let him know about this, and come up with a plan to give these girls another option, and how to grow up to be a Daughter of God without so much drama. I mean, for Heaven's sake!~ Some of the girls are only 12 and don't have the skills to cope!! I would like to have a title of a book or program that you may know to get a start on this, please. I often tell my daughters {13 and 15} that their "job" right now is to grow, love and serve Our Lord, and pray for God's will for their life. I have told them they are precious and beautiful, {both inside their soul and in their smile}and we talked about how they have been given a special gift they may share after marriage and to keep themselves pure for that time. {We also discuss Holy orders as an option for all three} I want to let these other young ladies know the same truth...and let them know they don't have to give in---I have read parts of "Sex Respect" and Uniquely Perfect and feel they may help. I just want to go in with ideas, instead of just being a whiner...please advise

    Posted on Jan 18th, 2013 at 10:42 AM by Donna L.

  • How about Theology of the Body for Teens or maybe something from johnnette benkovic about women of grace but i bet she has some things for teen 'women'

    Posted on Jan 18th, 2013 at 12:33 PM by unknown

  • Donna-- I'm curious. Are these topics that the girls are having on their own, or is this some kind of organized discussion? You mentioned that the director is with the boys at this time--are there any adult volunteers available who could direct the conversation in a better direction? It sounds like the girls are left to their own devices for a few minutes and that this is just where the conversation keeps drifting. Since this is their "free time" to socialize, I doubt they'd be amenable to having a formal book discussion or something during this time, but I agree that telling the director your concerns is a good step. Perhaps you could ask that an adult stay with the girls during this free time to challenge some of the gossip or to direct the conversation to better areas, and also suggest that as part of the formal curriculum some of these issues get better addressed.

    Posted on Jan 18th, 2013 at 1:16 PM by MR

  • Might be a good opportunity to point out to your girls just how much drama is involved in some of this - and how there's way less drama when things stay pure or less-serious. Some is probably just drama-for-the-sake-of-drama, but that whole "need a SO in order to be important" is such a dangerous (though common, and found equally among guys) idea. I'd agree with MR that making sure there's an adult in the vicinity who can interject some maturity here and there (while still giving some social time) sounds like the best way to guide things. And if there already is an adult present, perhaps that person doesn't know how to step up and provide real leadership and they need to recruit some other helpers. (Just thinking of some high school retreats that I helped lead in college where we were stunned, going in to wake kids up in the morning, to find that the parents had allowed some couples to share a sleeping bag b/c "they won't do anything with us right here" - i.e. adult presence doesn't always equal adult maturity/direction.)

    Posted on Jan 18th, 2013 at 3:49 PM by Anna

  • Hi Ladies! (unknown MR and Anna) I appreciate your ideas... Yes, this is the 20-25 minute socializing/snack time, and I don't want to take away that talk time they have. I truly think they simply haven't had anyone say, "you don't have to do that/feel that way/feel badly because/give in to his pressure..." I know that perhaps they can't talk to their own parents, and I am cognizant that they need some positive feedback...I know a few of my kid's friends have parents who very much buy into the myth about needing a S.O. to be worth anything, and it makes me shudder. I am married, and am glad to be. But when I was their ages, I was worried about acne, the cold war and finishing school. Even 30 years ago, I could see the drama that early dating and "playing house" caused to my friends. I was certainly no prude, necessarily, just very careful not to be alone with a guy -- I had plenty of "offers" from young men, but I was waiting for if/when I was going to get married. I was not EVER getting through 2 divorces as a child probably helped with that thought...Getting married and having kids was nowhere in my plans for my life. Now I am married and have 5 kids...God had a different plan, evidently {grin}. I think maybe I will approach it with the director and teen leaders, and ask if they have already set a plan/lesson for the girls about this. If not, I will tell them my concerns, and have a few resources to offer. I'm certainly not perfect, far from it, but I see the preciousness and purity in each of them and I feel passionately that they can hear it from someone who cares....before it's too late!

    Posted on Jan 18th, 2013 at 8:37 PM by Donna L.

  • Hi everyone! Can some of you recommend homeschooling forums to me? I am trying to decide if I should send my daughter to Catholic preschool next year or to homeschool and it looks like I need to make my decision asap. Thanks!

    Posted on Jan 19th, 2013 at 3:09 PM by HP

  • will not have another day, minute by minute will not go back, so be sure to cherish every minute. There is a pursuit, obviously disappointed, but would not go back. There is an effort, obviously fail, but do not want to stop. There is a love, obviously wrong, but would not let go; there is a beautiful, obviously fantasy, but do not want to wake upLife is sometimes not with right and wrong measured; life is not a coin that is not being anti-; life is not go, either black or white. Life, so many things in life, this is a lot of love, there is no reason, and without reason, love is love, love is love, there is no result, and without result, willingly, no regrets. Life is not really perfect, not only is the most perfect real beauty; life is not always successful, is the real success only stood up in frustration, only the flash of life is both eternal life. Do not pessimistic that he is very unfortunate, even more attitude towards life, happiness is their own thing, as long as like, you can always replace their remote controls, to adjust the window to the soul happy channel. Learn to be happy, even sad, but also smiling face. Institute of loneliness, not who will treat you as guarding treasure. Learn to be independent, can no longer blindly trouble others, their own thing their own. Institute of unsympathetic, the roll to roll, stay on the left. Learn to grow up, you can not be so capricious. Learn to forget, can not live in the past time. The mood is an emotional state, it has a good mood, it has self-confidence, and then have a young and healthy. To have a future life of longing, full of expectations, so we have a good mood, because the life is luck and happiness. Give yourself a good mood, let the world smile at you; to others a good mood, make us smile for life, good mood is the wealth of life, let us always accompanied by a good mood. People on such a life, fun is the day, is not happy day, so you must make yourself happy. People on such a life, not something wrong again, another broken heart is difficult to heal, so you will not regret it. People on such a life, after today unfortunate than you actually are still many people; not optimistic that he is very great, in fact, you just drop in the ocean. Learn to adapt, make your environment becomes bright; learn to adjust, so that you no longer feel sad; learn to be tolerant and let your life without trouble; learn dedication, make your life full of sunshine. In fact, the skies are blue, clouds the total to be scattered; in fact, the sea is not wide, the other side even to this shore; in fact, tears are sweet, when your heart to do so. With emotion to see the world is a tragedy, a comedy is a rational look. Sometimes not understand, just do not want to understand, and sometimes do not know or just do not want to say it. Sometimes he does see, but understand not do anything, so he remained silent. Some words, for keeping everything just some pain, only for silent forget some memories, only suitable for occasional out aftertaste. All the days will come, all the days, and will be the last, as if everything happened, and as if everything did not happen.Has been called back for a century,

    Posted on Sep 2nd, 2016 at 4:17 AM by wty123