Your Hubbie & You

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By Rebecca Teti

Thursday: Marriage

(Join each day’s Coffee Talk discussion: Mon: Parenting; Tues: Open Forum; Wed: NFP; Thu: Marriage; Fri: Education; Sat/Sun: Changing Roles)

Struggling in your marriage? Have some relationship advice to share? Have a marriage success story to share? Have a man/woman question? This weekly thread is the place to do it.

Come on in and join the conversation!

Rebecca Teti


  • Please pray for my husband this morning. He has an interview for a job. He was laid off last week and we're praying that this company will be a good fit for our family. Thanks!!!

    Posted on Aug 1st, 2013 at 10:05 AM by Amy

  • Prayers Amy!

    Posted on Aug 1st, 2013 at 11:45 AM by Claire S

  • Thanks, Claire! It went well. Now we just wait. ;)

    Posted on Aug 1st, 2013 at 12:05 PM by Amy

  • I'm so glad to hear that it went well, Amy! I hope they won't leave you hanging too long.

    Posted on Aug 1st, 2013 at 1:34 PM by ClaireS

  • Amy, any news on the job? Hoping there is but sometimes it takes a while for the entire interview/internal process.

    Posted on Aug 5th, 2013 at 2:51 PM by LauraL

  • Amy, any news on the job? Hoping there is but sometimes it takes a while for the entire interview/internal process.

    Posted on Aug 5th, 2013 at 2:54 PM by LauraL

  • We're still waiting to hear something. He's had two more interviews with different companies, so God is definitely working. Thanks for all the prayers!

    Posted on Aug 5th, 2013 at 3:55 PM by Amy

  • If anyone is out there and able to find this blog archive (although I hope it will be elusive to one certain person), I just wanted to say that I'm praying for all of you and hope that we will still be able to check in with each other despite all the recent turmoil on this blog. I have been up for the past two hours ever since a bat invaded my house, so between that and what's been happening on this blog, I'm feeling like I'm in the Twilight Zone!

    Posted on Aug 8th, 2013 at 4:16 AM by Claire S

  • ClaireS: I was also wondering what happened to the blog posts & if a certain individual was able to make it crash with incessant rantings. (I am asking the intercession of St. Dymphna for her.) Good luck getting your winged & furry friend to exit your home! What an (mis)adventure that must have been!

    Posted on Aug 8th, 2013 at 6:21 AM by Patricia

  • Hi Patricia; I'm so glad you found this thread! I suspect that the powers that be took down the other one because it was turning into a three-ring circus. Yes, the bat adventure was interesting, and it's not yet over! We've all been up since 4am est (I think the timestamps on this blog are CST). We got the bat trapped in a room, but then he hid and we couldn't find him. We called a bat expert who also couldn't find him. If we don't find him, we'll all have to get rabies shots (no big deal for my husband and me, but it will be traumatic for my son). So any prayers would be appreciated!

    Posted on Aug 8th, 2013 at 7:00 AM by ClaireS

  • Hi ClaireS! I'm on EST, too. You are probably correct that CD/F&F took the blog down for the time being. Hope they can get things squared away. It was nice to see some regular posting yesterday in response to DonnaL's question about books for her daughter. Are the rabies shots a preventative measure? Hopefully it won't come to that. Where is a modern-day St. Francis of Assisi when you need him to do some "bat whispering"? Praying! Take care!

    Posted on Aug 8th, 2013 at 8:08 AM by Patricia

  • ClaireS - That's some crazy stuff you've got going on this morning! I'll pray that it gets resolved without needing the shots. Patricia, what a great idea to pray to St. Dymphna. I'll join you on that.

    Posted on Aug 8th, 2013 at 8:36 AM by MR

  • I wonder why they took yesterday's post down. It seems like our friend can do the same thing here today.

    Posted on Aug 8th, 2013 at 9:31 AM by Alice

  • I love my mom, don't get me wrong, but sometimes she drives me (us) crazy. One of the things she does is ask "why". Sometimes there just isn't an answer. Recently I've found myself asking why (quietly to myself not outloud). Why "the problem" here, why are people so cruel to each other, reading the news-why so many bombings, and a general "what is wrong with people".

    Posted on Aug 8th, 2013 at 1:47 PM by LauraL

  • I posted on the Open thread the other day that has disappeared or has been taken down. I guess I've missed all the craziness here lately, which is lucky for me it sounds like. I don't want to add a single ounce of drama to my life at this point! :-) I'm sorry that someone has been causing so much trouble and running people off from this beautiful community! Thanks Patricia and anyone else who has prayed for my marriage. In answer to the question you asked that I can remember: no, I don't think Retrouvaille is an option because hubby travels a lot for work and I don't think it would be possible for us to make it to the sessions. I'm not sure he would agree to it anyway, but.... I'm getting up the courage to seek out a new therapist (I've seen a couple of different ones in the past that either didn't help or I didn't follow through with recommendations) so I can start over trying to get my own thoughts in order and on a more positive track.

    Posted on Aug 8th, 2013 at 2:08 PM by Marriage Misery

  • LauraL: As C.S. Lewis said, God takes so seriously the freedom He confers upon us that He is willing even to run the risk of men spitting in his eye. If to be free is to have the capacity for making wise & virtuous choices, it is at the same time the capacity to lose oneself in sin & damnation. That being said, even the most wicked among us are made in God’s image. They, too, are redeemed, by the Blood of Jesus Christ. Adam & Eve disobeyed God's one command, thereby imposing their own will in place of God's & forming a barrier between God and humanity. All of creation, living & dead, visible & invisible, is holistically connected. What affects one creature affects all creatures. Therefore, the effects of suffering & sin are shared by all of creation. But...we find hope in that nothing is greater than God, even the terrible evil that results from the free will of God's creation. In the face of great suffering or evil, the Christian is called, through keeping the commandments to love God & our neighbor, to finds ways to alleviate suffering & reinforce God's love & goodness in the world. Marriage Misery: We will continue to pray for you both. It sounds like you are on the right track in gathering your strength & getting help for yourself. Tomorrow is a new day. God bless!

    Posted on Aug 8th, 2013 at 2:29 PM by Patricia

  • Been away for almost a week on a "staycation" at someone else's house. The last time I checked I almost certainly thought this blog was done. So glad I found it. I, too, will storm Heaven and ask St. Dymphna for her help. Claire, many years ago when my husband was away fishing I awoke to an odd sound over the baby moniter. It turned out to be a bat getting caught up in the ceiling fan. When I opened the door it swooped out to the rest of the house. (At that time I didn't know it was a bat - I thought it was a bird) Long story short, we found it a week later hanging upside down from a curtain rod in the spare room. The window was close to the wall and the valance hid him. A broom and an open window manage to work for us. So check your windows - carefully. Good luck! Prayers for everyone!

    Posted on Aug 8th, 2013 at 5:05 PM by KMB

  • Thanks for the prayers everyone! (KMB: the first time I had a bat in my apartment, years ago when I was single, I also initially thought it was a bird!). The bat appeared at twilight, and my husband was able to catch it this time. We will have it tested for rabies, and we're going to have the bat man do a bat exclusion next week to figure out how it got in the house in the first place (so we can seal it off and hopefully prevent more bats).

    Posted on Aug 8th, 2013 at 8:01 PM by Claire S

  • Alice: I think they made the blog archive hard to find, in hopes that our friend won't find it (but hopefully everyone else will). My hope is that she will see it missing and assume that she succeeded in shutting down the blog, and then stop coming here. A girl can dream, right?

    Posted on Aug 8th, 2013 at 8:03 PM by ClaireS

  • Marriage Misery: I'm so glad that you missed the drama earlier this week, and that you have found this thread. I agree with Patricia that you are definitely on the right track in pursuing the help you need. I will keep you in my prayers.

    Posted on Aug 8th, 2013 at 8:05 PM by Claire S

  • I'm glad I found this. I will also pray for the person who was posting on the open thread. I have to say (and I don't blame anyone - change happens), but I miss the old blog.

    Posted on Aug 9th, 2013 at 12:22 PM by Susan G

  • I miss it too.

    Posted on Aug 9th, 2013 at 1:53 PM by Claire S

  • Well, I am glad I *found* everyone over here! I wonder if I may ask those who did write in about my daughter's search for literature, could you repost here, please? I have been away from F and F and didn't get to see any answers. Thank you and God bless us and those who need it most!

    Posted on Aug 13th, 2013 at 2:14 AM by Donna L.

  • Welcome back Donna! If I remember correctly, your daughter is 14 and is looking for humorous fiction? I had recommended the Great Brain series. It's a little young, and it's about boys, but the books are historical and hysterically funny . They feature a Catholic family in the 1800s. Lot of other people had great suggestions too, but I can't remember what they were. Unfortunately, I don't know that everyone knows where to look for the blog, now that it's not featured on the "front page" (and there aren't any new entries). But hopefully you'll get a few responses.

    Posted on Aug 13th, 2013 at 6:41 AM by Claire S

  • Glad you found us, Donna. I recommended the "All of a Kind" books. (Only the first one is in print, I think, but you can probably find the rest through interlibrary loan.) I think I also recommended some of Robert Louis Stevenson's books. They're targeted at boys, but I liked them. I was one of the last commenters, so others had already mentioned a few things I read as a teen such as the Betsy-Tacy books and (by Maude Lovelace, IIRC) Louisa May Alcott's books such as "Little Women" and the rest of that series and the series of three or four books that includes "Rose in Bloom."

    Posted on Aug 13th, 2013 at 7:31 AM by Alice

  • Donna, I don't have any humorous book suggestions but a series I read when I was her age is called The Keeping Days by Norma Johnston. I believe they're out of print but you may be able to locate them at the library. Loved those books!

    Posted on Aug 13th, 2013 at 2:36 PM by KMB

  • Someone else had mentioned Anne of Green Gables, which is a classic and has a fair amount of humor.

    Posted on Aug 13th, 2013 at 8:03 PM by Claire S

  • Donna, I had written a whole bunch of book suggestions, but I don't have a clue how to find the blog archive as some of you, I just saw this open this afternoon. If ClaireS or anyone else can find my answer in the blog archive, you are welcome to repost it for me, (although sounds like this opening that I found today might only be temporary?) Anyhow, if I have time later and can find it, I'll try to re-write my book suggestions.

    Posted on Aug 14th, 2013 at 1:26 PM by Mary Therese

  • Mary Therese, unfortunately, the thread where you posted your book recommendations has been removed, so none of us can access it. There are some other (old) threads in the blog archive, but that particular one was removed. For future reference: if you go to the Catholic Digest home page, scroll all the way down to the bottom and click on the small heading for "blog". That will take you to the blog archive. Thankfully our "friend" has not discovered this.

    Posted on Aug 14th, 2013 at 1:41 PM by Claire S

  • Thanks, Claire, for the info. :) Donna, here are some of the titles I posted last week. Someone already said Anne of Green Gables, and another older classic I've recently read is "An Old-Fashioned Girl", by Louisa May Alcott. Another more historical one that my daughter and I both enjoyed was "The Musician's Daughter" by Susanne Dunlap. Some fun humorous ones we've enjoyed are all those by Ally Carter--"Only the good spy young" series--plenty of humor, not very historical. Also liked "Princess of the Midnight Ball" by Susan Day George. "Cheaper by the Dozen" by Frank Gilbreath (not in fiction, usually biography) is a humorous historical book. Hope those help some!

    Posted on Aug 14th, 2013 at 5:51 PM by Mary Therese

  • In keeping with the old F&F coffee talk, I have a housekeeping question. I am trying to find a deep fryer that also stores the strained, used oil. My husband is looking for this and said he saw it somewhere but, obviously, can't remember where. Any ideas? Thanks!

    Posted on Aug 17th, 2013 at 12:45 PM by KMB

  • Another housekeeping question...does anyone have any success stories in using more natural methods to treat fleas on your dog or as an alternative to flea bombing your house? This wet weather (at least in our area) has made it a bad year for fleas. I am reluctant to go the flea bomb route because I question the safety of the chemical exposure for our family. Thanks in advance for any suggestions!

    Posted on Aug 19th, 2013 at 4:59 PM by Patricia

  • Please pray for my husband he had a job interview we hope it went well and he hears from them and he can start working again he has not worked since his merger took place were seeking for him to get back to work soon thank you prayers intended and much needed Pat and family.

    Posted on Oct 16th, 2013 at 4:24 PM by Pat

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